So yes she was ashamed and humiliated of what she did and that contributed to why it was so hard for her to tell me but its not an excuse. Girlfriend has lied twice about texting ex fwb. I get the full yelling and crying and calling me names and saying I'm mean and don't care... plus levels of them denying any memory of any earlier conversations that would make a politician facing a testimony before congress blush).
Keep in mind that this is what people do when they feel threatened. If he's bothered by not knowing it, then it's not true that it benefits him in no way. When we met, I was a virgin. What do i do next? I called her and asked where she was and she said she was at home sleeping - obviously not true. You're liberal, you're sex positive, etc. I had sat down with her multiple times trying to comfort her and explain that its ok and were not all perfect and I won't judge her for what she tells me. Me and my girlfriend have been together about 8 months. I can understand that but I cant view that as an excuse to lie to someone that your in love with. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. Or you put your foot down about honesty and changing your shared history. Why did she need to lie the next day? Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help! In the beginning of our relationship she told me various phrases such as "i don't remember their names" or "my past is irrelevant to our relationship".
You're making the right choice. When I told her I was at the apartment so that was obviously impossible, she said she was at my apt, also untrue.
I doubt she will ever tell me the truth regardless. /r/Relationships is a community built around helping people and the goal of providing a platform for interpersonal relationship advice between redditors. Couples counseling? How many people she slept with or something? Why are you asking your girlfriend for very specific private details about her past sexual history? Most men and women would date a person who was honest about being a Virgin or having a bunch of past partners but most ppl would be pissed if they found out they were lied to. Though, he has stated explicitly that it's the lying that bothers him, not her sexual past.
It still was not enough for her to just come clean and let go of all of it. My wife lied about her romantic past, now I don’t trust her: Ask Ellie. Its just history to me and my philosophy is why not tell the person you care about the most the truth? I'm just a guy. It finally came out last week that she had actually given a handjob to my friend instead of just kissing him and now I feel so hurt by the weight of these lies. I have no issue with her hooking up with other guys as I have plenty of hookups in my past. It's called trickle truth.
Learning the truth is not pleasant – that’s why lovers lie. More so than anything else was the discomfort in unveiling that was alarming to me rather than the number.. almost as if she was intentionally hiding something. Those who were uncomfortable with their partners sexual past, how did you manage to get over it ? By Ellie Advice Columnist. In their study, researchers found that dating couples lie to each other about 33 percent of the time. That is a bad sign cheating or not. Uh, yes, she did, by lying to you. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast, More posts from the relationships community. it will pay off big time for the girl lucky enough to be your next gf, She has always been so vocally against that. By using our Services or clicking I agree, you agree to our use of cookies. Is there really such a thing as an offensive lie and a defensive lie? Then she made up a story you couldn't disprove.
I know virginity is a construct and doesnt matter, but i put a lot of emotions into it because finally being in a relationship was such a big deal for me. The main reason i even posted this is my concern over the lying. There was never one time where she actually came out and confessed about what she has lied to and the only way she cracks is by me constantly probing into her about it. I told her the "i don't believe you" part multiple times under the pretense that maybe she'll go "oh wait, there was that time" but that hasn't happened. Lying is wrong, but her past isnt. Most of them stem from guys she was hooking up with while we were talking. The dishonesty is a problem. Hilarious. However, when I asked her about specific individuals she flat out said there was nothing that had ever happened between them or that they had only kissed.
I was also sexually assaulted by another girl in high school. I am extremely uncomfortable with lying and this with her sexual history. Edit: For clarification, the first guy was someone different. So, I didnt think I would ever be in a healthy relationship and frankly was very wary of relationships before I met Maya.
I am 25 years old have been with my girlfriend who is 22 years old for 8 months and she has continuously lied about her past. Whether it's romance, friendship, family, co-workers, or basic human interaction: we're here to help!
To be clear with anyone reading this, I do not care about the number of people shes been with or what she has done with anyone being that I wasn't in her life at that point. Caught girlfriend in a lie, not sure what to do My girlfriend went out last night while I was away for a wedding, and was very odd/vague in her texts the entire night. Just leave her alone and accept her for she is. Additionally, i've lost a bit of faith in her trust now.
Any advice would be appreciated.
I know exactly how many women i've been with and all of their names/when's/why's. So basically my girlfriend lied to me, changed stories about her sexual past. I had not dated or had sex with anyone anyone before Maya and I put a lot of trust in her and the relationship.
They stick to something because they don't want to flip-flop and get found out, but the story is so weak they have to be so deluded that they think you'll believe this or think you're stupid. True, he might be disturbed upon finding it out, but depending on his personality, he might be disturbed even more by not finding it out.
One extreme is when nothing is told at all. And why would you worry about her being safe and sound at a co-workers place after a night of drinking? It is her business. I just want the truth so I can accept it and move on. And you want an honest genuine person as your girlfriend. Copyright © 2004–document.write(new Date().getFullYear()) I want her to keep explaining to me but I doubt it will do any good because I guess I just don't believe her. Everything has been wonderful except that throughout the relationship, I have caught her in various lies in various ways, usually through someone else telling a story and not knowing I was not privy to the details. We seek posts from users who have specific and personal relationship quandaries that other redditors can help them try to solve.