Somewhere there is a woman who will love him for who he is, and he'll love her in return. My son, Austen, just reminded me that it’s Friday the 13th, so it all makes sense to me now. It's confusing. You are right, and that is what we are doing from now on... however, he routinely forgets why I'm the one managing his paychecks and starts arguing with me for more money even though I'm trying to pay off his debts. I can relate to this as I used to think that I needed everything now, vs saving my money for something better later. You might ask if I actually replied to the original message, and if so, what did I say. This man obviously considers cooking and cleaning to be women’s duties and he doesn’t think of lifting finger to at least make things easier for you. When did this start? Think about it - the way you would explain something like say, a symbiotic relationship between multiple species would be completely different depending on whether you were talking to someone in 8th grade, someone in college, and someone with a degree in ecology or biology. ), The Boy Who Cried FIBROMYALGIA! Different people have different degrees of aptitude towards certain things, and they can't help it. If someone stands in front of me and gives me step by step directions of something to do, and I need to do it in proper order--forget it! So, left to my own devices, I forwarded the original message to my daughter and brother, and was reassured that not only am I not “dumber than dirt,” I am also not a racist. Part of a successful relationship is playing to each other's strengths, and since his weakness is money it's in all of your best interests for you to handle it, you should never get to a point where your husband has you on the last 5 dollars a week before pay day. Also, when the two of you spend some time together, you always fight, which is also a sign of disrespect. What happened, you might ask? If you are okay with that - go nuts. "But it's the last five dollars, what else could I do with 5$" me: facepalm "I dunno, maybe buy a pack of pasta". That in itself can kick in a ton of associated responses that have a negative connotation. Cut his losses and yours by ending it now. Whatever money he makes should go into a pool from which you pay all the bills, add to savings, and then give him back spending money from what's left after all the important things have been paid for. And a man like this will never be the one who will make you happy and fulfilled. Don’t get me wrong—it is a great thing if you have a partner who inspires you to become better but that doesn’t mean that he is entitled to change the essence of who you are. In fact, his behaviors as you describe them sound a lot less like someone who is kind and forgiving, and more like someone who is mentally passive. Hindsight is 20/20. He enjoys spending time with other people more than with you and you can’t make a deeper bond with him. I am not a doctor. Writing is not her job, it’s her passion. Your marital partner should be your teammate and there is no place for lies in your relationship, even when the truth is harsh and tough. I can't remember. I could not imagine having kids with him. I have good ideas. Keep a visual running total of how much money you have available to you somewhere near the board. Anyone with fibromyalgia can be affected by fibrofog--men or women; however women are more likely to be affected by it. Even when he does something, like cleaning the table after himself, he does it after you ask him to.
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